For many years, I allowed my emotions control the way I walked through life and made decisions. If something felt right, I did it. If something didn’t feel right, I avoided it. Needless to say, I surrounded myself with people and situations that satisfied me and filled my feel-good tank. I eventually decided to study theatre and dance in college and made plans to move halfway across the country to Los Angeles. I was going to become a famous actress in Hollywood.
This fleshly behavior sounds a lot like the way a majority of people live their life, especially those who are unsaved.
But I considered myself a born-again Christian, and I received so much advice from other Christians to continue to pursue my dreams.
They told me to follow my heart. “Do what makes YOU happy!”
But there was a problem…my heart was wreaking havoc on my life!
My anxiety was still there. Depression was always lurking, and my relationships were a mess!
My heart’s desires were leading me into more pain and deeper into sin because I was constantly allowing my feelings to be the guide of everything in my life…
…until one day, the Father intervened.
My eyes were opened to my selfishness, spiritual depravity, and unhealthy addiction to my emotions. I repented for always living for myself and the Holy Spirit helped me to die to myself daily, and I began to seek the Lord with everything in me by spending time in His Word and attending church regularly.
Ultimately, I learned what it meant to submit my will and seek God’s will for my life, trusting that He would be faithful to direct my path.
One of the first verses that I memorized was Proverbs 3:5-6 that helped me during a time I needed to make a big life decision- if I was going to move to LA or not.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
Proverbs 3:5-6, NKJV
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct[a] your paths.”
We must trust God to be our guide, not our heart, as culture may tell us, or even what makes logical sense sometimes to our minds. If we have embraced Jesus as our Savior and the Lord of our life, the Father has given us His Holy Spirit to lead the way.
If we are putting our trust in everything or anyone, but the Lord, we will constantly be disappointed and lead astray and into sin. We must trust in the Lord with all of our heart, which should never be filled with more of this world than God’s Word.
It is our job to make sure that we are guarding our heart with all diligence (Proverbs 4:23) to protect ourselves from deceit and only allow the Truth of God’s Word to be sown in it and take root.
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I’m so thankful that during that time in my life while I was faced with a major decision, I kept my heart full of God’s Word, which helped me lean upon Him for wisdom on what to do. One month after deciding that it may not be God’s will for me to move to Los Angeles, I was introduced to my now-husband and the rest is His story.
My advice to you, beloved one, is do not follow your heart. Follow God instead. He knows what you need more than you do. Trust Him with your entire heart and He will mold it to look more like His.
Are there things in your life that you are trying to control? Are you allowing your emotions or other people to influence your life decisions and behaviors?
Perhaps it would help you make a list of decisions, worries, concerns and bring them to the Lord in prayer, especially as we enter this new year. Beginning 2020 leaning upon the Lord and trusting Him is a great place to start every day new day and every new year. His ways and directions are perfect and He will never lead you astray.
